Month: February 2014

The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central components of the heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units.

This defect has been technically termed, “Subsequential Internal Non-morality”, or more commonly known as SIN, as it is primarily expressed.

Some other symptoms are as follows:

[a] Loss of direction Foul vocal emissions [c] Amnesia of origin

[e] Selfish, or violent behaviour [d] Lack of peace and joy

[f] Depression or confusion in the mental component

[g] Fearfulness [h] Idolatry Rebellion

The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect is providing a factory authorized repair and service Free Of Charge to correct this SIN defect.

The Repair Technician, Jesus, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required. The number to call for repair in all areas around the world is:

P-R-A-Y-E-R. Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure.

Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component. No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:

[a] Love Joy [c] Peace [d] Patience [e] Kindness

[f] Goodness [g] Faithfulness [h] Gentleness Self control

Please see operating manual, HOLY BIBLE (Believers Instructions Before Leaving Earth), for further details on the use of these fixes. As an added upgrade, the Manufacturers made available to all repaired units a facility enabling direct monitoring and assistance from a resident Maintenance Technician, the Holy Ghost.

Repaired units need only make Him welcome and He will take up permanent residence on the premises!

WARNING:

Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids Any Manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to the dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded. For free emergency service, call on JESUS.

DANGER:

The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven, so as to prevent contamination of that facility.

Thank you for your attention. Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important Recall Notice!

February 17, 2014

Prayer of St Francis

Sunday, October 11, 2009 5:26:17 PM

St Francis of Assisi led the life of a hermit monk after forsaking a life of riches, and this prayer is attributed to him.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.

Where there is hatred, let me sow love;

where there is injury, pardon;

where there is discord, union;

where there is doubt, faith;

where there is despair, hope;

where there is darkness, light;

and where there is sadness, joy;

for your mercy and truth’s sake.

O, Divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek

to be consoled as to console;

to be understood as to understand;

to be loved as to love;

for it is in giving that we receive;

it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;

and in dying that we are born to eternal life.

The Prayer of St Francis of Assisi